I had a relationship with a girl for about 2 years. We have been apart for over a year and I still love her as much as we did when we first got together. We were both virgins when we were together and I know she loved me. My bad habits drove her away and now I'm older and more mature, I want her back. Except, now she is going out with other guys and I have to watch while they hurt her. We don't even have a friendship anymore, but I want anything I can get with her. I've been with a lot of girls sexually since her, but I can't for the life of me get the feelings back I had with her. Does she feel the same? Am I wasting my time? Should I tell her how I feel even if it makes her pull away more? - Hopelessly Devoted

Dear Hopelessly Devoted,
Knowing where you stand is always, in my opinion, the best option…if you can achieve it! For now, I'd probably play it a little cool until you can establish a friendship. You will probably be able to guess whether she still has lingering feelings of love during this friendship stage. Since, you've had an established relationship for a lengthy period it shouldn't be too difficult to talk about your feelings together. The important thing to remember is to take things ONE step at a time. Don't rush things. Really let your friendship take a hold. To avoid being too platonic about your friendship though, do very small romantic gestures once in a while. Things like bringing a fresh cut rose, picking her up from school or work and calling just to chat are ways you can keep from being just the "nice guy."

With Love,

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