I am a single mom who regularly takes my child to children's art classes. Over the past year, one teacher (a man) has gone out of his way to be kind to my son, and me. He almost always tracks me down for a one-on-one conversation, and asks me thoughtful questions about my job, my opinions, etc. He has asked me to stay overtime to look at some of his own works, and remembers little details about me, and brings them up in later conversations. I am so crazy about this man. I eventually worked up some nerve, and handed him my number. He programmed it into his cell phone, and never called. I was very disappointed. After that, I avoided him, until one day, we ran into each other. He asked me how I was doing, and said he wished I wasn't so busy so he could see me more often. He is still very attentive to my son, and goes the extra mile to show him new exhibits. He makes poor eye contact with me up close, but when I am across the room, I swear I can feel his eyes on me, and I look up, and catch him quickly looking away. I am polite, but more distant, because I don't want him to think badly of me, like I'm a stalker/psychopath. I still have strong feelings for him, but I have no idea what he's all about. Any thoughts? Thanks! -Still Holding a Candle

Dear Still Holding a Candle,
There is a slight possibility that he may just be an amazing teacher with no interest in you at all. Having said that, I highly doubt that is the problem you're having. The odds are in your favor that he's just extremely shy or nervous about asking you. Since you've already given him your phone number, and he hasn't called, it's time to take things in your own hands. The next time you see him and he tries to engage you in a conversation, tell him you'd love to talk with him, but you have to run, and why don't you meet up for coffee or lunch/dinner later that day. If he has plans, give him one more alternate day/time (that you've previously thought about). If he can't make it, doesn't offer another day/time or balks at that date, get out gracefully, while leaving the ball in his court. A perfect way to do that is to tell him something along the lines of, you'd love the opportunity to talk more and for him to call you when/if he has more time. At that, I'd relinquish hope and maybe direct my attention to another. If he calls you or asks you out, GREAT! If not, at least you'll know you gave it a chance.

With Love,

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